A Note on Growth

I had someone tell me once that you know you\’ve grown if you cringe when you look back at your past photos. Truthfully, I cringed at the pictures from last August the second after we took them. I wasn\’t truly in love with my outfit, was insecure about myself, and was nervous about leaving home.

So how am I different now?

1. I\’ve lost 10 pounds. I know there\’s all kinds of diets and such going around and all these ideas that the number on the scale isn\’t the most important, but for me it\’s always been one of my insecurities. My senior year, I decided I needed to start making changes because I was so insecure about my body. I lost 10 pounds my senior year, too. Because for so long I thought it was impossible, this is a really positive thing for me.

2. I\’m more aware. The thing with college is that you learn a lot and get to experience a wide variety of people. Because of this, I\’ve become more aware of social/ethical/ecological issues in the world, and with this knowledge, I\’ve become more confident in myself and my actions to strive for a better lifestyle.

3. My style has changed. While I enjoyed the benefits of attending my private high school, I always felt that my personal styled was always stifled. I had clothes that thrifted and hadn\’t had a chance to wear, I had clothes that I wore on the weekend, I had clothes that I wore every chance I got. In addition, I had all these things pinned on Pinterest for my dorm room and future house and it covers all these different styles because I didn\’t feel I could ever truly pick my style. Being able to style myself every day has allowed me to really hone in on what my personal style is.

While I feel like some of these changes are wonderful and incredible, there\’s one way that I\’m still the same: I still am insecure in ways, though it\’s more minimal than it was before. I still play the comparison game from time to time. I still worry about whether or not I\’ll ever truly succeed. I still don\’t know what I\’m doing with my life. But just like any insecurities I dealt with before, I have to tell myself that I\’m not the only one.

Much Love,

Jacquelyn