Rough Days (or Weeks…) Will Happen

I\’ve officially lived on campus for two weeks today, and it\’s been really good. But despite how great it\’s been, it\’s also been hard. In an effort to be completely transparent, I\’ll share that one day this past week after classes, I came \”home\” and cried the whole afternoon. Luckily, I have THE BEST roommate in the world and she gave me a hug and suggested that I have an extra cookie when we went down for dinner. But that\’s just how some days are and how some are going to be. I\’m a far way from home and that was my choice, and I have to live with that.

This weekend is labor day weekend, and all of the people I\’ve gotten to know went home, which means that I\’ve had a lonely weekend. When one of them found out that I wasn\’t going home until Christmas, they got all bummed for me, saying that it sucked. And as I explained to them it does, but doesn\’t. Last night all my friends were all together in Lafayette, and I was sitting in my dorm was movies by myself. And, yes, it sucked that I wasn\’t with them, but I\’m the one to chose to go so far out of state. While I hope that they miss me, I am the one that has to get over the fact that I can\’t be there. In a way, it\’s also training for all the times in the future that I won\’t be able to be there. It hurts, but that\’s life.

Now because I\’m so far away, I\’ve been going out of my way to find little comforts here and there. One of the first things we did when we moved to Lafayette 7 years ago, was get library cards. We went to the library so much when we were little and although I used my school library more than the public ones, I\’ve always loved having access to books. Unfortunately, I couldn\’t bring my whole bookshelf to Kent, so one of the first things I did was find the nearest public library. It\’s a nice 1.5 mile walk from my dorm, but the access to so many books made it all worth it. (I checked out New Moon, first!)

The next thing I\’ve been doing involves food, but is anyone really surprised? I don\’t think so. Don\’t get me wrong, there are so many KSU dining options and a lot of them are really good, but some times they can\’t satiate my cravings. When I\’m craving Chinese food, a chicken sandwich is not going to cut it. Regardless, as I experience these random (and sometimes weird) cravings, I write them down. If I can satisfy it on my own by buying something at Target or go to a place nearby, I do it. If not, I now have a list of everything I want to eat when I get home.

Another thing that\’s brought me a little bit of comfort, especially this weekend since I\’ve been mostly alone, is that I\’ve been watching movies. Weirdly enough, it\’s been movies that I\’ve loved and already seen. Movies that I loved as a kid (The Princess Diaries, anyone??) and as a teenager (Mamma Mia! for the win!). If anything else, it\’s nice to have other voices on in the background.

The last thing is that sometimes I just need to put on my most comfortable clothes and go to class without worrying about anything. As much as I love dressing up and putting in effort, taking a minute to focus more on my mental health and comfort is so, so necessary. This is really what I wore the other day and I felt Great:

Anyway, that\’s all for today! Now if you\’ll excuse me, I\’m going wait for my Chinese food that I just ordered! 

– Jac

Outfit Details:

Blouse: Cloth and Stone // T. J. Maxx

Pants: Thrifted

Sandals: Steve Madden

Tie-Dye Shirt: Bubba Gump Shrimp Factory in NYC

Leggings: Under Armour 

Socks: Forever 21